InLove

If you go to your bank to make a withdrawl, would you expect the teller to give you $100, if you only put in $50? That is how a lot of people are treating relationships these days. Many people come into a relationship bringing baggage and bad habits, but expect to get love, trust and respect. It just doesn’t add up.

If you are a woman and you strip for a living, meaning you sell your body, you can’t expect a man to love and cherish you. Reason being, you don’t love and cherish yourself. If you are a man and you sell drugs for a living, you can’t expect a woman with a bachelors degree and a real job to settle down with you and take you serious. Although some people make these mistakes, they soon find out that the two just don’t mix and it won’t last. Again, it’s like a mansion built on the sand.

So when going into a relationship, put in what you want to get out. Give what you want to get in return. Be realistic and really come to terms with your self-worth. If you can’t do that, then just ask someone who is completely honest and straight forward what they think of you. I know ppl say it doesn’t matter what others think, but in reality that is the furthest thing from the truth. We are nothing but what others think of us. We aren’t given the privilege in life to define ourselves, especially if our definition is a lie. If you think what you think is all that matters, let me ask you this: When is the last time you interviewed yourself for a job and had the opportunity to decide if you get it or not? When is the last time you graded your own work and that’s the grade that went in the books? When is the last time you were able to decide for yourself where you would fit inside of someone else’s business, or life? We are what others think of us, so make sure you are portraying what you want others to perceive. The trick is, we may never really know how people really see us. But one thing is for sure, we will get out what we put in. It’s the law of the land.

God Bless!

There is a new type of woman surfacing in this ever independent society. This is the “available” woman. The woman who doesn’t mention her other half until she knows the man she is conversing with has the guts to mention his other half.

A select group of dating or married men have tested this new phenomenon and have been left baffled by the findings. The question is: Why? There was a time that a woman would let you know she had a boyfriend, fiance, or husband before you even opened your mouth to speak to her. Now days many women will talk with a man for hours never mentioning they are seeing someone unless that man does.

So I ask: If that man never mentions his other half, would the women mention hers? It’s the weirdest thing, but it shows us the way our world is growing. Are we coming into a time that women are keeping their options open just as men have always done? Are we coming into a time where women will cheat without really caring as men have always done? It seems women are assuming the same positions as men these days and many women are making more money than men these days also, so now are women beginning to think like men too?

It’s somewhat confusing to the men that have encountered these type of women. The man doesn’t know whether to be flattered or disgusted, at least he can be proud of the fact that he beat a woman to the punch of admitting to being in a relationship. So if you are a woman, ask yourself if you are this type of woman. If so, what type of man makes you become this “available” woman? I wouldn’t practice this tactic to often though, it will only come back to bite you.

God Bless!

There is a woman out there that has learned how to manage her time so that she can get the best out of herself and her day. She has calculated what it takes to be a Christian,wife, mother, employee, and entrepreneur. She has prioritized in such a way that she confuses the average woman. There is no wasted time in this woman’s day. She’s like a machine almost. She has devised a system that leaves no area of her life lacking. She is able to please God, herself and man all in a days time.

In actuality this is how God designed a woman to be, but many have fallen short. So if today you are the “Robo-Woman” pat yourself on the back and keep finding ways to become even better. If you haven’t grown to be that type of woman yet, sit down and figure out what are you lacking and how can you better use the time in your day. Here’s a daily planner from a Robo-Woman I know.

1.Wake up,brush up,sit and Read a Chapter from the Holy Bible
2.Get the kid(s) up and make their breakfast,change pampers,etc
3.Put on the clothes you’ve already had picked out and ironed from the day before.
4.Make yourself a little breakfast,and leave the husband a note leading him to his food and work.
5.Go to work and fully dedicate to your job no matter how much you hate it.
6. Get off work and go get the kid(s).
7. Come home square the kids away and beginn cooking dinner.
8. While dinner is cooking spend time with the husband and the kids
9. Serve dinner,then when it’s finished clean and wash the dishes.
10. Prepare the kid(s) for bed.
11. Get your clothes picked out and ironed for the next day for you and the husband.
12. Get on the computer and take care of your email,web-business,or personal aspirations
13.Shower, cuddle with the husband meeting both your needs.
14. Be in bed by 11pm and sleep well from a long days work!!
15.Wake up shower,and do it all over again with PRIDE!

I keep hearing this statement, loud and proud. It seems as if women are empowering themselves to the point that they become self sufficient and no longer have to depend on two incomes or a man to help them run their life.

This is a new age and a new day and with Oprah and Hillary Clinton on every page women all over are becoming stronger. Many men are wondering how will this effect their “prowl”, how can they get close enough to a woman to get her to let her guards down. What many aren’t realizing is this is a good thing.

It feels a lot better to find a woman who has already found herself. A woman who knows who she is and what she wants out of life. A woman that is understanding and submissive to the will of a good man. This woman develops these ways by first being able to develop herself.

So now all we need is for men to get that same type of power, in the black race educated women to men is 7:1. We need men to step up and decide to become more self sufficient and find out who they really are before entering into a woman’s life and ruining her because he hasn’t found his self yet. If we come together as two complete beings the mesh will be a lot easier and we will be able to work together instead of one for the other.

There is an awesome quality combination that women should posess, but only few do. That combination is ambition and meekness. The woman who has the drive and determination to make money but the willingness to let her husband teach her how to properly spend it. The woman that can get money, but still take care of home. The woman that can travel the country doing her thing but never leave family behind.

This woman is a hard one to find. In today’s society the word “submissive” is taboo. It’s sad, but what that shows is just how wicked the world is growing. Many people are forsaking the teachings of the Bible and growing more and more evil. Our people are losing the essence that God instilled from the beginning. The Bible says “wives submit unto your husbands, and husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church”. That statement is clear, but so many people are getting caught up chasing money and dreams and forgetting about the duties we have at home.

I praise the women out there that have found a balance. The women who are successfully pursuing their dreams and goals, but at the same time taking care of home and sharing true love.

God Bless!

Many of us go into dating without ever really knowing what we are getting into. Then all of a sudden a light comes on and we realize that the person we are with aren’t who we thought they were. Whose to blame? Certainly not the person you’re with. It’s your fault because you didn’t ask enough questions.

You want to find a person that is articulate and that can think and speak easily. What I’m talking about isn’t just the actual skill but the process of being someone who can think through problems and understand themselves. If you ask a person questions about themselves and they give you “I don’t know” answers then that isn’t someone that is ready for a real relationship. In order to be in a relationship we must first be complete, otherwise we will just tear down what the other person is trying to build.

So when you are seeking true love, ask questions! Get a list of basic questions that will show you that persons current situation, future goals and aspirations and their past. You want to know where the person has been and where they are going. That way if you are taking the ride with them, you will know what to expect. Never hold back questions because you are afraid of running them off! In actuality that is exactly what you want to find out. If a person can’t stand answering a few simple questions then you know they won’t be able to stand the trials and tribulations that come with dating.

Be smart and Be blessed!

There is a type of woman that stands out before the rest. This woman is the “listening woman”. This woman can speak for herself, she can also think for herself. She can do for herself and in essence all she really needs is herself. But she has learned that two heads are better than one and she has accepted her God given role.

She understands her role is not to stand by a man to deceive him into doing things her way. Instead her role is to stand by him to give him the strength to do things the way they ought to be done. This woman has decided she will listen and learn. She’s understood that although she has wisdom of her own, there is another type of wisdom that she lacks. So instead of just settling with what she has, she is open to advice and leadership from her man.

This is the “listening woman”. She has become a man’s pride and joy. She is all that he needs and he wouldn’t trade her for the world. Wow, what a gem she is. So rare, so pure, so distinct. This is the “listening woman”.

Ask yourself: When is the last time I just shut up and listened?? Who have I ran off because I wouldn’t listen? How much better would my life and relationships be if I’d just listen? The “listening woman” just listens even if she knows she is right and what she is listening to is wrong. She listens because she knows a wise person doesn’t argue with a fool. She listens because she knows that a fool will be corrected by life and she doesn’t have to say word.

This “listening woman” listens soo much she is wise beyond her years, therefore she has nothing to prove. All she does is listen and live by example.

God Bless!

That’s an awesome phrase I heard a young lady say and I was shocked that it came from a woman, but it sat very well with me. The reason why is because women ought to try and learn what keeps beating them instead of getting mad at it. We all know we can’t function properly when we are mad anyways, so don’t get mad get smart.

With Fathers day approaching it’s important that Fathers realize when raising daughters it’s more to teach them than just how to cook and clean. We have to teach our daughters how to live and cope with a man. A woman can hold a masters degree, make 100k a year, drive a benz, and be well kept. But if she doesn’t know how to handle a man then her life could be doomed. So it’s important that women try their best to understand what goes on inside of a man’s head. What makes him tick? What makes him want more than just you? What makes him hit? What makes him happy? What makes him mad?

Those are lessons women ought to seek out and get all the wisdom, knowledge and understanding they can hold. You won’t go wrong, trust! You can use all the knowledge you can get on subjects like these. It’s time we grow and communicate so that we can better understand one another and so we can have longer and healthier relationships.

God Bless!

There is a surge of men trying to find themselves in our broken economy. All many men have on their mind is dollar signs, or how to make a dollar. Many men can’t sleep at night because they toss and turn trying to come up with a way to get ahead. Their wife or girlfriend isn’t getting to many hugs or kisses because his mind is preoccupied with the the pie in the sky.

What is a woman to do? You can make a change in that man if you desire to, but if your goal in life is making money too then I’m sure you are fine with the way things are. So this blog is for the women who don’t care about how much money her man has. This is for the woman that values family more than material wealth. I say to you: sit him down and look him in the eye, then tell him how much he means to you. Remind him that it profits a man nothing to gain the whole world and to lose his soul. Tell him that money can’t buy happiness and that you would be completely satisfied as long as the bills can be paid and you have love. Let him know you don’t like sleeping with an invisible man or having to kiss yourself on your way out to work. Let him know that his dream chasing, is your nightmare chasing you.

I hope and pray that you can come to realization with your other half my friend. It’s not about how much wealth we can accumulate on this earth, but instead it’s about what we are storing up in heaven. Live for God and love life not worrying about tomorrow. Let tomorrow take care of itself, because after all-it’s not even promised to us.

God Bless!

Love is about trust, but as easy as it is said we all know it’s one of the hardest things to do. Trusting someone could take forever if you let it, but I believe I’ve found the secret.

We view life and gain knowledge by our own experiences and the experiences of those around us. Therefore we only know what we’ve lived or what we’ve seen. Therefore we are able to make judgements about certain situations with the knowledge we’ve gained in the past.

With that being said: I believe that the key to trusting someone else is first being able to trust yourself. If you can trust yourself and you have no sense of guilt then you won’t expect your partner to have any either. If you are complete and you love yourself and you love your partner then you will expect the same in return.

So next time when you start feeling insecure think really hard about why those feelings exist. Try to pin point why you feel he or she may want someone besides you. The real answer may be because at times you find yourself wanting someone other than them. Therefore you conscious mind tells you if it’s possible for you then it’s possible for them and that may not be completely truly. But that speculation could lead to problems in the relationship.

So before you get to serious, make sure that you are complete as a person. Then you will be able to enter into a relationship whole and secure and able to trust the person with all your heart.

God Bless!